Forgiveness must be immediate, whether or not a person asks for it.
~ Rick Warren
The easiest way to forgive? Make it a way of life. Let forgiveness be part of our makeup, part of our DNA, and our character {who we are when no one’s looking}.
Let us fully commit to understanding why we need to forgive. When we can approach forgiveness with pure hearts and no “yeah buts” … forgiveness will start to become a part of our DNA. I’m living proof of that.
Truth is, it isn’t always easy and sometimes I really don’t want to forgive. But the more I understand I’m required to forgive the easier it becomes.
And the easier it becomes, the easier it is to forgive immediately. Because friends, if we don’t learn to forgive immediately, a bitter seed is planted and roots of bitterness start to grow.
Do not be bitter or angry or mad. Never shout angrily or
say things to hurt others. Never do anything evil.
Ephesians 4:31 {NCV}
I pray we use this study to prepare our hearts that we might live tenderheartedly towards others. Let’s think of our hearts in the way a garden is prepared … please let it be said I’m the last person considered a garden authority … but what little I googled do know, just might serve us well here.
As one would prepare a garden or flowerbed, the first step is to prepare the ground for planting. By turning the soil, pulling weeds, and making sure there’s proper drainage. When proper preparation is done, the garden has a greater chance to produce a bountiful crop. The opposite holds true, if the right preparation isn’t done, the garden is likely to die.
How does this apply to us?
- We need to prepare our hearts – through this study, through prayer, through understanding
- Turn the soil – spend some time in prayer discovering what’s hiding in our hearts
- Pull out any weeds – unresolved bitterness and unforgiveness
- Proper drainage – to drain is to empty out. Let us commit to hearts that empty out any ugly things that could take root, and replace them with things that are holy, pure, and righteous.
Nothing good will come of holding on to unforgiveness and bitterness. It’s a poison that will eat us alive if we let it.
Here’s a scenario to ponder:
There are two siblings of the same sex. As very young children, their mother up and leaves them. No word, no warning, just leaves. The children are left with their dad, who remarries a woman who isn’t too fond of her new stepchildren and treats them poorly over the next several years and into their teen years. Sadly, their father never stepped in to help his children.
As we follow one sibling, we notice anger, rebellion, bitterness, pessimism, and the-world-owes-me mentality. Bottom line is, this child is harboring unforgiveness and is seemingly living bound and shackled
As we watch the other sibling, we see a loving, kind, tenderhearted, obedient, and strives-to-make-a-better-life-for themselves child. It seems this child hasn’t let unforgiveness and bitterness rule their life. This child lives in freedom.
It’s important to note in this story, the birth mother, father, and stepmother never asked for forgiveness. They never admitted to doing anything wrong. In fact, they were most likely, oblivious to how deeply these children were being hurt.
We need to take note that even though forgiveness wasn’t asked for, or a wrongdoing admitted to, the child who lives a life of forgiveness, lives a life of freedom.
As I write, I can literally feel these two children and their attitudes in my soul. When I think of the first, I feel heavy and sad. But when I think of the second, I feel weightless and free!
Shouldn’t we always live weightless and free? It’s our choice you know. God gave us free will to choose how we’d react to our life circumstances. Thankfully, He also gave us an instruction guide.
Get rid of all bitterness, rage, anger, harsh words, and slander,
as well as all types of evil behavior. Instead, be kind to
each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another,
just as God through Christ has forgiven you.
Ephesians 4:31-32 {NLT}
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